sjsprWriting

A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT DIRECTED TOWARDS FUTURE SENIORS

Beware of this horrible, horrible illness. Comparable to Ebola. 

There is no way to prevent it. There is no cure. 

Symptoms include:

- Lack of motivation to do any homework, or to go to any classes,

- An unhealthy obsession with the vortex of unproductiveness that is the Senior Lounge,

- Increased chance of falling asleep in class,

- An incorrect notion that you will have time to do your work in the morning,

- An uncontrollable desire for nightlife.

"I have coped with Seniorits all my life. Ever since kindergarden, I have had trouble staying awake in class, finishing assignments on time, and trying to ignore the lure of nightclubs. I thought it couldn't get worse, until summer of Senior year came around. I entered the dementia phase, where my body somehow convinced my mind that I was reading my summer readings, when in reality, I wasn't. My friends warned me. I wouldn't listen. The dementia phase only got worse when school started, and the lounge opened up. I found myself unconsciously playing pool for hours in the lounge, forgetting about all my work. My mind would convince itself I could complete two-hour readings in five minutes..."

- A firsthand account from Tatiana Pelegrina, who is currently in intensive care, desperately battling for her future. 

Your only hope is that you were born with incredible guessing skills.