sjsprWriting

I won't deny it. I'm afraid.
Afraid you don't like me as much as I like you.
Afraid I'm not good enough.
Afraid I'll be vulnerable.
Afraid you'll hurt me.

You'll pick my body up with your ravenous hands, dying to eat my soul.
They'll brutally crush every single bone in my body,
and throw the remnants on the street for the rats to eat.
Then, you'll walk away as if nothing happened...
I want to believe in you; I do!
I want to peacefully sit by your side knowing you pose no threat.
I want to get lost in your eyes and find myself in your lips.
I want to carelessly fall asleep in your arms.
But something in my inner conscious tells me not to.
Something tells me to be wary of you and of what you'll do.

It's not that I'm fragile because I'm not;
You out of all people know I can stand through a hurricane and survive it.
You know I can turn the winds of a tornado and the waves of a tsunami.
It's that I'm trusting you with something so important for me.
I'm trusting you and I don't even know if you should be trusted.
I don't even know if this will go anywhere.
I don't even know if this will be worthwhile.

And I know this will probably not happen,
And I just have too much time on my hands,
And I'm just thinking too much,
And I'm just wallowing in my nostalgia of previous heartbreaks...
But I won't deny it. I'm afraid.
Afraid of you; afraid of love.